Heartbeats

The heart, the tiny one, does really beat, when the waiting was over.

Speechlessness. Only grateful tears.

Please keep growing and be stronger, my tiny tiny sweetheart.

Ultrasound

Waiting outside the ultrasound room of the clinic. Waiting for a sign, a sign of event—either of happening or of non-happening. Waiting for a verdict, one that concerns life and death.

Does faith or prayer have any place in a waiting like thus? The mind stops working, all sounds strike mute.

Waiting for a sign, a sound. A sound at the ultra level. An ultrasound of heart that beats, and will keep beating our hearts.

Just beat, please!

Site Maintenance

Site maintenance is never easy.

For no reason, the site server has been infected by the backdoor program W32.Esbot.C two days ago. Though it is best to clean the virus by rebooting the server into the safe mode (yes, I'm always regret for not running a Linux server), I have grave difficulty to follow the lead. I can only remotely control the machine, trying my best to kick out the Trojan horse which has seriously destabilizes the server performance for some time.

Again, for no reason, the virus suddenly disappears after several not so successful attempts at dispelling it. My limited knowledge of the server structure and equally limited experience in safekeeping the server cause this inexplicable phenomenon.

For now, I'm still uncertain of the server's status: whether the disappearance is temporal or permanent, or whether the site server will run cleanly and smoothly from this time on.

The very lesson I've learnt from this is simple: were I to be given a second chance, I will never run a portal-like site for many, but a personal site for me only.