Being Weightless

eMule v0.45b Statistics

Runtime: 67 days 1:47 Hours
Transfer Time: 66 days 17:34 Hours (99.5%)
Upload Time: 66 days 17:31 Hours (99.5%)
Download Time: 57 days 1:06 Hours (85.0%)
Total Server Duration: 66 days 8:28 Hours (98.9%)

Downloaded Data: 66.57 GB
Download Sessions: 57033
Total Overhead (Packets): 3.68 GB (61.81M)

Uploaded Data: 107.86 GB
Upload Sessions: 172405
Total Overhead (Packets): 4.44 GB (78.89M)

It's already been over 2 months. The existence in the meantime can be said of the ecstasy of information overload at best, and of unbearable weightlessness and mental blankness at worst. For over 2 months, my being seems transfixed by the endless flow of bits and bytes in to and out of the computer, by the vast and boundless sea of informational exchange. It is all about share. Yet is it? What is this emptiness inside that would surface time and again even after the great joy of successfully getting the target files following the long wait? Watching the incessant change of figures, numbers, and statistics of the data transfer, one cannot help shuddering at the ecstasy of overloaded information. One at the same time cannot avoid tasting the bitterness of an existential modality that keeps losing its weight. Is this one way to be free? To be free or merely to feel free? Or there's no difference in between? To feel free and to be anxious about being thus. The difficulty of living!